Dreaming and Very Little Else

I know that during this Blogging Challenge that I have undertaken this month, my blogging has been very focussed on that topic with very little mention of the country estate and the happenings out there.

Well, truth be told, not too much has been happening there recently, between family, vacations, and other stuff, the move to the country estate is in limbo. I vowed I was going to hang 10 pictures last weekend, and only did two.  It's hard to decide what to put where, and putting holes in our newly painted walls is psychologically damaging!!  However, I did get these two done and that's one end of the hall finished - yay!



Two pics down, 900 to go!

What I have been doing is planning the garden, pouring over Seed catalogues and websites, doing some layouts in my mind.  It's got me itching for spring to start planting, but meanwhile we are eating lettuce from the covered raised bed now.  Although only a few of the seeds germinated right away, I see that a few more have suddenly spring to life, so I am curious now as to how long we will be able to enjoy this little luxury before a hard frost does them in. 

I have also been planning to re-purpose some of the unique items that were left for us by the previous owners.  One is a chair made of horseshoes!  I am going to spray paint it a cool colour (to be determined) and put it in the garden area.

 The horseshoe chair will be painted and displayed in the garden like this!

There is also a very rickety old wrought iron and wooden bench overlooking the pond, that would be hazardous to sit on in it's present state.  So I am going to turn it into a funky planter box.

 

 I am going to style my planter bench after this planter chair concept

 

Also earmarked as a planter is the old bathtub used as a watering trough for the horses of the previous owner.  With a fresh coat of paint, it will be a fabulous planter for some annuals to add a pop of colour to the place.

The bathtub planter idea

 

 



Is This a Test?

Well I had a bit of a shock this morning when I checked my email and found no Blog Challenge topic on this, day 22 of my 30 day Blog Challenge!  I have come to look forward to these inspirational suggestions and so I was quite let down when there wasn't one in my in-box.

Then, I decided it must be a test of some sort.  But no, it was just some kind of glitch, apparently. 

Carina says she will check what happened when she gets home.  Carina is my Mindful Living coach/challenger.  She lives in Copenhagen and so with the time difference, usually she has long since posted the daily challenge when I finally get out of bed and check my email.

But what if it WAS a test?  What if I was supposed to just review and put into practice today all of the 21 concepts outlined in the challenges this far?  That got me to thinking and what I realized is that I actually have been working on all of these concepts since they have been introduced.

I have been taking the time to appreciate the moment I am in - even when it is a challenging moment, one that I would prefer not to be experiencing.   Like, for example on Tuesday night, when I left early for choir, with the intention of getting my 50 length swim in before choir started.  Only to discover that my car would not start.  Rather than getting mad or frustrated, I opted to look at it as an adventure - a change of plans that I didn't count on, but could to lead to who knows where?  So I went back inside and got Chuckles to come and help me.  The time delay meant that I couldn't swim, so I just used the sauna and hot tub, and spent time in each with my eyes closed, being aware of my breath and the feelings in my body.  It was very relaxing and rejuvenating.  Then I arrived early enough at choir to connect with some friends who I haven't chatted with for awhile.  So, what could have been a situation leading to anger and frustration, became an opportunity to do something pleasurable.

I have also paid much more attention to my surroundings, what I see and hear.  I have spent less time with my headphones, so that I could take in more of...life!  Last night, we went out for dinner and there was a bus shelter right outside the restaurant.  Scrawled across the advertisement in purple felt pen were the words "Everyday is a blessing".  Normally I probably wouldn't even have noticed that, or if I had, I would have focussed on my negative feelings around graffiti.  (Which I still don't think is right, don't misunderstand me!)  But the sentiment was right on. It made me smile. 

Savouring my cups of tea, making time for family and friends, really listening to people, being kind and gentle to myself  - these are some of the positive things that I am doing as a direct result of this challenge. 

Suddenly I am seeing the good before me just by choosing to open my eyes to it.

Day 21 of the Blog Challenge - Waking Up in the Morning. Slowly.

Most of my mornings are slow and steady.  I like to leave enough time to do what needs to be done without too much rushing around. 

This morning was one of those delicious ones - awake before the alarm went off, knowing there was time to savor the warmth of the covers, the chill air on my nose and the pattern on the wall from the street light outside shining through the window blinds.

Then the steaming cup of coffee taken back to bed, to rewarm my feet which became chilled going to the kitchen. 

The luxurious sensation of dozing after the coffee was gone, listening to the radio -  a song, a contest with a caller and the news of the nightmarish traffic for the poor people that commute.

The satisfied feeling that I am not a commuter.  I am just steps away from my desk.

Ahhh...

In contrast to yesterday, when the alarm had not been set.  Rush rush rush.  No question, the way I wake up sets a tone for the rest of the day. 

I recall when the kids were young and every day was that kind of rush - getting everyone ready and fed and lunches packed and text books found and sharing one bathroom, frayed tempers, missing shoes, watching the clock, "we're running late, late LATE".  I felt like my first moment of restfulness was when I finally got to work! 

It was the way of life then, but I prefer my routine now much more. Though I probably wouldn't appreciate it as much if I hadn't lived through the other!

Drink Water Challenge

This really is a challenge for me, I know I should drink water, and I guiltily drink a whole bunch on Tuesday afternoons when I know I am going to choir later (although at last night's practice I heard that drinking water doesn't lubricate your vocal folds), but often I drink tea or coffee. 

Because it was a cold day here in North Vancouver I chose to drink mostly hot water today, and it was really nice!  I could drink as much as I wanted without getting a burning stomach, which happens with coffee (that's when I would switch to tea, normally!)  And, funnily I had to keep refilling my mug because I kept drinking it all!  And since I didn't really notice an increase in trips to the bathroom, I suppose I usually am quite dehydrated.

I also noticed I wasn't cruising the lunchroom for nibbles every time I went by. 

Just prior to writing this I was practicing my music and drank practically my entire water bottle down, and I will have another at the pool tonight.

I read somewhere today that 45% of our actions are habitual.  So if it's my habit to not drink water, suppose I need to work on changing it!

Day 19 Blog Challenge What is the Tone of your Self-Talk?

Wow, it's got to be beyond coincidental how frequently during this blog challenge that a topic comes up that I touched on in my blog about a previous challenge!

Just Sunday I referenced my inner-voice and how harsh and critical it usually is.  I have been working over the past several years to tune it out, or at least to feed myself some positive praise and encouragement, and Sunday's challenge of coming up with 3 things I am doing well really helped me to see that it's important every day to remind myself of all the good things I have and do.  Inner voice be damned!

The analogy made in the explanation of this topic was very helpful for me.  Pretend that I and my inner voice are friends.  How would I feel if a friend spoke to me that way?  How long would they be my friend?  Would I speak to a friend that way?  Of course not, it is hurtful and detrimental.  Instead of building up, negative self-talk tears down. 

Daily, especially when life is presenting lots of challenging situations, I will make a point of reminding myself of the good stuff.

Our epic move to the country estate has become a bit bogged down of late.  Between vacation time, family visits, and life in general, the forward momentum of the progress has really slowed, and both Chuckles and I have been feeling down over this.  So, the coping skills presented in this challenge are so useful in putting this into perspective.  Instead of being down on ourselves for what we haven't done: "We have so much left to do.  We are not making progress. "  This can be reframed as  "Look at how much we have done already!" " We knew this was going to be a long haul." " There is no best-before date on this project, it can take as long as it takes."

  In fact, this blog really is a documentation of our big change of lifestyle and the process of getting there.  As with life, it's all about the journey, not the destination.

Recovery Weekend

Hi there!  How was your weekend? 

We had a different kind of weekend at the country estate this past weekend.  I was there completely unexpectedly.  I was supposed to be at my choir retreat, but then my back was suffering all week long and I knew that it would only worsen unless I took the time to treat it right AND Chuckles hand got all infected and he ended up requiring daily hospital visits for intravenous antibiotics AND my sister and her husband were still at the country estate, days past when they had expected to have gone home, because my brother-in-law had some setbacks following a surgery and wasn't up to the 10 hour drive home to Prince George.  SO... there we all were, each dealing with our own stuff, but being together in support of one another. 


Day 15 of the Blog Challenge - The Challenge Today is Relax!

First thing in the morning, before the rest of the household was awake I went out for a long walk and enjoyed an hour of early morning solitude.  It was chilly and threatening to rain, but I bundled up and walked to the end of our country road.  When I got back to our driveway, I wasn't quite ready to go back indoors, so I headed off in the other direction.  My walk took me up a side road, where I watched some ducks float lazily on their pond, and goats in a field, each one hiding in it's little shelter, watching me as I passed by.  I spoke to the two horses I found in the pasture at the end of the road as they eyed me with interest, their ears twitching as they processed my voice.

 

 

Two scenes from my morning walk

 

 

Later I raked leaves with my sister's help.  The pond area was inches deep in leaves that had come off the walnut, alder and red maple trees in that section of the yard.  She raked and I gathered the piles into a wheeled bin, and pulled them into the pasture where the big compost pile is and dumped them. Happily, my back was improved a lot just from sleeping in my own bed!   We worked for some time despite the drizzle as it was pleasant to visit and work together and we only stopped when the rain became heavy.

 

 

A sea of leaves

 

 

In the afternoon, I had the house to myself for several hours, so I played my guitar and prepped the dinner.  Relaxing to me is engaging in activities you enjoy, without feeling pressure to be doing something else.  By that definition, I had a very relaxing day!

 

Day 16 Blog Challenge is What are Three Things You Do Well?

 

This challenge was particularly interesting to me, as I like many people, have that inner voice that constantly tells me where I have failed, or come up short, or neglected to do something. 

 

While that inner voice doesn't get my attention as much as it used to, this challenge is a good reminder to me that it is important to tell myself what I am doing well.  Why is it we feel okay about beating ourselves up, but feel a bit silly giving ourselves praise and compassion? 

 

I was drinking my morning coffee with my sister as I opened my emails to see what the challenge for today was, and as soon as I read it out to her, she said "Three things you do well? Oh that's easy!" 

 

Here is my list for today:

 

Prepare healthy meals

Exercise regularly

Maintain a positive outlook 

 

From doing this challenge, I realize that this list could change daily, or even hourly.  The important thing is that when the little voice comes calling with it's laundry list of negatives, there will always be positive things I am doing in my life that I can remind myself about.

 

In the afternoon Jennifer and I went out to the Co-op.  This used to be nothing but a feed mill with a small store attached, but it has morphed into a bustling and trendy grocery store with a general store component boasting clothing, footwear, hardware, tack and just about anything else you might need.  Except fine-tipped Sharpies which we looked for but couldn't find.  They do have this funky horse outside, however.

 

 

My sister has begun a new hobby, based on her abiding enjoyment of doodling.  When watching TV to keep her hands busy, she creates these most intricate and beautiful doodles with nothing but a fist full of fine tipped Sharpies.  She gave me two pieces she did this weekend and every time I look at one of them I see new things that I didn't notice before.
 

 

 

 

Day 17 Blog Challenge is What Robs You of Your Joy?

 

The pressures of life - needing to be someplace else or doing something else, and feeling that there is more to be done than there is time to do it - are the things that rob me of my joy.  Wanting to savour a moment or an event, but feeling the need to rush headlong into the next activity. 

 

Also, getting negative energy from other people can really affect my mood.  This was pretty apparent this weekend, between all the good stuff.  Chuckles isn't good at sitting around doing nothing, which was all he was able to do, sit and keep that hand elevated.  That put him in a bad mood, and it was challenging for me to be empathetic without being dragged down into his misery.  However, employing some of the mindful living tools I have been learning about, and getting him out for a walk in the fresh air on Saturday morning definitely helped both of our spirits! 

 

This really speaks to the crux of mindful living.  Appreciating what is happening right now, without letting what just happened or what's about to happen get in the way of that.

Despite that the weekend was not the one I had scheduled or planned, it turned out to be a lovely weekend spending time with my sister.    As my only sibling she is a very important person in my life, and with the distance between us, we don't always get to spend a lot of time together.  So this weekend was a very special one.   Even though she beat me at Scrabble several times....

 

 

 

 

 

 

Torn

It's still day 13 - the challenge is around emotion.  It sure is!

I was standing in Bed, Bath and Beyond for no other reason than Chuckles was lying down nursing his painful infected hand and I didn't want to disturb him, when my sister called to say they will be staying through the weekend for my brother-in-law to have more recovery time before they make the 10 hour drive home.  They spent the day in emergency at the hospital near my house where they are staying, while we are in the city working.

I am torn several ways.

I am scheduled to go up to my in-laws for the night tomorrow and then to my choir retreat for the weekend.  Yet, I feel like I want to be there for my sister, brother-in-law and Chuckles over the weekend. And I want to spend time with my sister at my new home, I have felt jealous this week of her being there and not me!

But...  If I don't go to the in-laws I know my mother-in-law will be disappointed and me too since I havent been there for over a year!  A year! Egad, that's bad!  I would be disappointed to miss the retreat, although I have been several years in a row, so it wouldn't be the end of the world.  But its fully paid for and non-refundable.  

I am going to the pool now for some swimming therapy for my back (improving, yay!) and will mull this dilemma over a little more.